August 1, 2012

Why Does Africa Do This To Me?

Last time we went to Africa, I thought I was doing good - I had the kids packed up and dropped off to my parents with a schedule of places to go and people to keep them busy. I had packed and repacked the bags we were taking with us to fit everything we wanted to take and things others wanted us to take and still had a little extra room. The plane left the next morning and we were all set.

Then I stopped into the youth office at church where the secretary in charge of the trip asked me if I had the remaining money left to be paid on our accounts?!? I had paid in full according to my records. I thought I had been fastidious but I was short? I cried. I got mad. I cried. Basically I lost my mind.

This time around I'm cleaning my house from the inside out, having a garage sale this weekend, fixing all the things we've left undone at our house (some of them for years), packing for one child to stay, two to go, two adults to go and four extra bags of "fun" stuff. I'm working fulltime and worrying about meeting my quotas while I'm gone. And I'm not close to having this trip paid off. In fact, I spent all of this morning dealing with financial woes.

My phone company has decided that I owe $500 in overage fees for something I thought was covered. After paying off trip stuff and house stuff our bank accounts are very delicately balanced at this moment . . . and there are MAJOR expenditures on the horizon as we leave for this trip and finish house stuff like sod and curtains and replacing bedding with something that looks appropriate.

And this morning my husband decided to solve my problems by making a decision that ultimately was probably not the decision I would have made. But it is done and he was trying to help and he wants this trip to be fun and enjoyable, not full of stress and worry.

And so I'm crying. Trying not to be mad about stupid things like ridiculous phone bills and delayed paychecks. There's no way I'm going to make it to next Friday without more tears. And I'm not even sure I have enough of my brain together to be able to "lose" it.

Why is it Africa seems to do this to me?